last week, i baked cupcakes for a friend's birthday. they were peanut butter cupcakes with chocolate buttercream icing. they were pretty darn good, but for a girl who isn't a huge peanut butter lover it was a little too rich for me.

v a p i d .

i always do this, i always get excited and then it never works out. another friend, another failed attempt, another disappointment. i can not express how sick i am of being unemployed/waiting to start this new job. it is bad for one person to have this much free time. i don't need to think about my life this much, to think about all the things i dislike about my life, to think about all the things i want to change but don't know how, to think about all the people i wish i could see. it drains the motivation out of me. most people would kill for free time, and i don't want any. i miss being so busy, i don't have time to sleep.

the truth is rarely pure and never simple.
-oscar wilde

e a s t a u s t i n i t e .

i was featured in a blog this past week - east austinite.

each week james writes a feature on someone living on the east side. you should definitely check it out! email him to take par and answer his questions. i love reading about the folks that live over here and seeing their perspective on how the neighborhood is changing. they also feature all the fun happenings of the east side. it's carving a spot in my heart just like the austinist.

and i am back at square one. again.

h a p p y !

this is a good one!
----
Sagittarius-
Your current optimism may not last as long as you wish, but you can use it now to set important events into motion. Your approach to a current situation may be quite eclectic; no one knows what you're going to do -- least of all, you. Nevertheless, if you trust your instincts rather than the rulebook, you could be happily surprised by the outcome of whatever action you initiate.

t h o u g h t s

a few thoughts for today:

- sometimes i don't want to be the one that always calls to see what is going on.
- maybe he's just not that into you - story of my life.
- i have cabin fever, but no money. not a good combo.
- you know you are broke when you are making only brown rice for dinner.
-i miss when my life was so busy i was never home and never bored.
- "damages" is my new addiction.

m i x e s g a l o r e .

birthday mix complete.

fleet foxes - white winter hymnal
destroyer - beggars might ride
menomena - muscle'n flo
sloan - i can feel it
the dismemberment plan - ellen and ben
ted leo & the pharmacists - first to finish, last to start
mates of state - my only offer
hall & oates - kiss on my list
ike & tina turner - nutbush city limits
traveling wilburys - wilbury twist
rilo kiley - the execution of all things
ben gibbard - you remind me of home
she & him - why do you let me stay here?
neutral milk hotel - two-headed boy
the kinks - a well respected man
the mountain goats - dance music
voxtrot - long haul
santogold - l.e.s. artistes
grizzly bear - on a neck, on a spit
the new pornograhers - adventures in solitude
sufjan stevens - jacksonville
spoon - delicate place

i can't wait to give it to them, and i found the best card! i love birthdays!

i'm having one of those days where i feel restless. nothing is satiating my desire to go go go. i'm not sure what i want to do, or where or anything for that matter. i just don't want to be at home. i could be in someone else's house doing nothing and that would be fine. i just can't sit in these four walls anymore doing the same thing i do all day long. these are my last few days of freedom and i want to live them up with my friends. sad part is, all my friends have real jobs.

v a l e n t i n e ' s 0 9 .

work has already begun on the valentine's mix of 2009. it's a little early to unveil this year's version, but i feel confident in the mix. i also need to make a mix for a friend's birthday. this will be a challenge. let me know what you guys think! here's what i have thus far:

hot chip - over and over
destroyer - european oils
bon iver - skinny love
fleet foxes - he doesn't know why
j mascis and the fog - does the kiss fit
the new pornographers - go places
little joy - brand new start
neil young - harvest moon
ray lamontagne - can i stay
death cab for cutie - you can do better than me
sam cooke - cupid
animal collective - winters love
kayne west - love lockdown
rilo kiley - with arms outstretched
kings of leon - use somebody
the shirelles - will you love me tomorrow
jenny lewis - tryin' my best
nicole atkins - the way it is
jens lekman - your arms around me

it's number five, hard to believe.

i want to write an entry about the ups and downs of 2008, but i can't quite wrap my head around writing it all down. it was a year that took the cake. i feel i truly became a grown up. i think it might be something that has to be written down on paper then transfered to the internets.

coming soon...the life and times of avan version 2.8

once again, i'm confused by a boy. as the motto in college went "i'm breezy!"

today was perfect. i couldn't have asked for a better new year's day. let's make a list, because i LOVE them.

-woke up and watched the rose parade. beautiful.
-watched "burn after reading" - not a fan.
-walked four miles around town lake with avery.
-gorgeous weather!
-ate comfort food with ronnie and went to see "doubt".
-had a fabulous new year's eve. the holiday has regained my faith.

i'm ready for this year. i'm excited about all the possibilities that it holds.